Saturday, August 8, 2009

I beg your PURSE !

If I had a bank balance like, Bill Gates or Warren Buffet, then the very first thing which I would have done, was to give 80% of it to the Greedy Beggars (yes greedy not needy) of Hyderabad.

Hyderbad has the most number of beggars in India, and no I am not kidding. A survey result came up with this and I had read this news a year ago in T.O.I. Now, after that news I am pretty much sure that a few other aspiring souls forwarded their resume to 'The beggar association' and have successfully been recruited. The reason why I am saying this is because now every 3rd non-working person is either a 'beggar' or an 'engineer' or 'both' in hyderabad, it seems. The figures have increased drastically and dynamically within a year. Damn Recession !

Alright coming to the actual point, I am sick of every good looking & physically fit beggar, well versed with English,Hindi and Telgu. These guys posses 'ama-bloody-zingly' awesome talent to beg. Today I saw a guy in jeans and a shabby shirt asking for money in front of a bakery and People being kind, gave him some money. He waited for sometime and then with the 'speed of sound' (yes 'speed of light' is overrarted) went to the same bakery and ordered a burger.

Some of these guys even have their bank accounts in 'HSBC' and they are insured by 'ING Prostitute' as I see a lot of them standing and fagging in front of the respective buildings. If they come up to you and ask for money, you better give them at least Rs 10 note, else they will give you a $ 50 bill and you then will feel like a beggar. Sometimes It happens that I face the same beggar 10 times a day because they have their areas fixed. When they start begging in Hyderbadi-urdu-hindi mixed tone like this :

"kya kartey itta paisa le k, allah bhala karta humein khane k wastey diye toh. Haww miya, bheekh nahi maang rahe, do wakht ka khana maang raae...."

you feel like either giving him away whatever you ever had or put a KG of cotton in your both ears. Though I get fantasized by 'Hyderbadi-urdu-hindi' but listening it like this, sucks. I should probably be writing about such an accent in a seperate post.

Some beggars follow you up till eternity and I have seen them embarrassing 'Young girls' intentionally. The condition is so pathetic that you come out of your house and you will see a few of them standing irrespective of the what time it is, in front of your house. It's so unlike other cities where their population is restricted to Temples, Traffic lights and railway stations. The attitude they carry is 'Yo let's cut to chase, temme what big note you got and I am givin u the change u want". Man, After a few years a kindergarten scene will be like this;

Teacher : Bunty what do u want to become when you grow up ?

Bunty : Teacher, I want to become 'Pappu beekhaari', He is awesome. He works just in one shift, earns double the amount my dad earns and has all the rights in the world to assault young girls publicly unlike my dad.

I salute Madhur bhandarkar for showing the hidden truth in the movie traffic signal.

Begging plans anyone ?

43 comments:

  1. Okay! I am laughing at this post... coz I have been traumatized by these beggars for 2 yrs wen I stayed in hyd... One of them slapped me on my leg while I was sitting in an auto... coz I did not give him anything...

    Once we made one kiddo beggar eat Dosa in a restaurant... and well, he started following us
    daily...:D :D

    Do you know, beggars in hyd make 300 crores approx every year acc to TOI survey...

    ROFL...grooom..vrooom..drooooom... at the joke... hehehe

    ReplyDelete
  2. I didn't know Hyd has the maximum beggars...gays bhi maximum..beggars bhi maximum.. :O very modern city che :O

    it totally sucks and the only terrible experience i had with beggars was in mumbai :(

    lol @ the kindergarten situation... :P

    ReplyDelete
  3. @mads
    LOL

    @Peter
    See... use fake currency notes for them..!
    uss currency ka use bhi hojayega.. peeroblem solved!

    ReplyDelete
  4. aila! I agree with mads..i also never knew hyd had so mnay beggars!
    In Delhi too u can see small children of the age less than 7-8 performing acrobats when the signal is red! n then this way they expect ppl to be happy n give them substantial amt of bheekh!
    Bad condition che!

    ReplyDelete
  5. same at my side of the world...gawd!!2 me it doesnt make sense...y ll ne sane person who s absolutly fit 2 work n EARN prefer BEGGING instead??it drives d hell outta me..

    ReplyDelete
  6. lol.. i m still laughing..
    but dnt u think..the after hyderabad ..it would be delhi..arey!! yar jaan kha jaatey hai.. n by chance if ur going with ur friend(Female )..they will harras u like anythng..

    ReplyDelete
  7. u cant help it..

    the more u give , the more there will be on streets..!!

    :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I didn't know the beggar population in Hyd is so high.

    Regardless of the number..the situation everywhere seems to be the same.And seriously coz of their fixed places ..it gets so irritating to see them.

    lol @ pappu bhikari

    There;s this insane beggar at a temple near my home who roams around the streets & does weird stuff.Ppl give him food & he layers the food at diff points saying his 'friends' - birds need to eat :P LOL
    Once He took up a stick & acted as if he were playing a flute :|

    I need to watch Traffic Signal.

    ReplyDelete
  9. seriously..
    thxs for increasing my Gk...
    max beggar
    they look more fit than me..:P...
    I had a very bad experience with beggar..soo duhuu..to the fit n fine beggars :|

    lol..@pappu ...:P:P

    ReplyDelete
  10. do u give money?? i don't.

    i hate those rascal type beggars :x

    ReplyDelete
  11. He he he....
    "kya kartey itta paisa le k, allah bhala karta humein khane k wastey diye toh. Haww miya, bheekh nahi maang rahe, do wakht ka khana maang raae...."
    he he he... perfect!!
    I can sense you are feeling.... :))
    It was funny... Specially the joke in the end... pappu bhikaari lolz... :D

    ReplyDelete
  12. ROFL, heard someone talking about hyd, so I'm here to know what it is about that my city is the talk of the post.. =D The topic of beggars here eh? Ask me too! Beggars in hyd, are not only rich, but are also very good at acting =D

    ReplyDelete
  13. ok, so the hyderabadi acccent was really phunny....never knew ppl beg wid so much of "tehzeeb" in hyderabad...
    nice observation. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  14. so what are you planning to do now as your engineering is finished ;)

    think again dude!! money matters!!

    ReplyDelete
  15. hahahha!!

    once i have been to a place near gangapur in Rajasthan...and we were giving food to some begger children....sheesh, they were touching me and asking for food..i was so scared and i ran inside...

    i tell u..the interiors of India is much worse in this case....

    ReplyDelete
  16. There is thsi begger i meet every day in the same street of park. (park st.)
    he is young, may be 12 yrs old and begs. also cleans taxi ka sheesha at times. i gave him coins whn eva i feel like and other time i tell him sorry dude no change and he will reply. ok next time didi. Byee.. imagine!!! He recognizes me and i too. we both smile whn we see each other.

    ReplyDelete
  17. And what is your opinion about the thousands of eunuchs who plague the city parks, beaches, red lights, demanding extortion from every bhoola bisra boy nd girl spotted together... even though the guy happens to be your brother ?? :P
    Once when i used to be arnd 10 years old we were in Jaipur, on a family vacation... and i had pretty short hair.. so this beggar boy comes near our car and says to my father... tere pappu ki jai ho... tere pappu ki jai ho... and my dad says ... Ye pappu dikhta hai kya? so he changes his dialogue... Tere puppy ki jai ho tere puppy ki jai ho... That is when i broke into an abysmal laughter :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oopsie!! Great minds think alike huh!!1 I wrote about the begging menace 4 days back!!!

    Bangalore is no different, we have beggars who are choosers!! We have transgenders at traffic signals groping young men to part with money!!

    I recently saw a lady maybe in her mid 30s wearing cargo pant and a camo print T shirt and sneakers. Modern looking, attractive - begging at a signal. Too shocked. I doubt if this was her part-time and her full-time job would be a senior manager in some IT firm :-D

    ReplyDelete
  19. @ Harshita

    you have been here ..so obvsly u know :)
    btw the number has increased tremendously in last four years.

    ReplyDelete
  20. @ Mads

    hyd is extreme :P
    Mumbai mein bhi hain bahut se mainey suna hai !

    ReplyDelete
  21. @ Abhinav

    Main aaj bhi fake(y) hue note nahi deta kisi ko !

    ReplyDelete
  22. @ Apparently

    U know what their parents force them do do so ...in some cases they even burn them

    ReplyDelete
  23. @ Pallav

    thats why i dun go anywhere with my female friends anywhere in delhi =)

    ReplyDelete
  24. @ sugar

    talented beggar it seems ..milwana kabhi :P

    yeah watch it .it's sensible !

    ReplyDelete
  25. @ Ams

    haha :)
    they eat all day ..so obvsly be fit :P

    ReplyDelete
  26. @ I'll try to be

    i dun ...unless i am either forced to or i feel for it :P

    ReplyDelete
  27. @ deepika

    LOL yeah i know ..!

    ReplyDelete
  28. @ Ether

    ohh u from hyd ?
    i shud write about hyderbadi hindi in my next post ;)
    do read it :P

    ReplyDelete
  29. @Prianca

    hyderbadi accent is awesome ...if only u can understand it :P

    ReplyDelete
  30. @ scattered thoughts

    Yea fortunately i have a job now else i was srsly planning :P

    ReplyDelete
  31. @ Enchantinganki

    ohh :O
    yeah specially the religious places

    ReplyDelete
  32. @ Nidzi

    u say sorry dude :O
    ROFL hahahaha =))

    acche dost ban gaye hain tere kolkata mein :P

    ReplyDelete
  33. @ The misdirected arrow

    eunuchs and hyd ...also have something in common !
    btw i hate them coz they harass people a lot :(

    LOL at ur incident ..btw u still have short hair duntu ?

    ReplyDelete
  34. @ insignia

    yup i know ....some trendy beggars do exist ...everywhere !
    i have encountered a lot of them in recent times :P

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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